For your audition you must present a 1-2 minute monologue of your own choice. If you don’t have a monologue you can use, the following is a list of appropriate material to choose from. The choice of material is yours, the following monologues are not compulsory but optional. Please choose a character within your age range where possible. You may use accent if you wish, but we will be focusing more on general acting technique, rather than accent accuracy.

 

Monologue Index

Male Contemporary

  • Rumors: by Neil Simon (Lenny Ganz)
  • Dead Heart: by Nick Parsons (Ray)
  • Fool for Love by Sam Shepard (Eddie)
  • Camelot by Lerner and Loewe (Arthur)
  • Eat your Heart out by Nick Hall (Charlie).

Female Contemporary

  • The Star Spangled Girl by Neil Simon (Sophie)
  • Addams Family Values by Paul Rudnick (Wednesday Addams)
  • Three Sisters by Anton Chekhov (Natasha)
  • Who’s afraid of the Working Class? By Andrew Bovell (Rhonda)
  • Listening by Edward Albee (She)

 

Monologue Selections

Male Contemporary

No 1 –  Rumors by Neil Simon

Lenny Ganz: At exactly six o’clock tonight I came home from work. My wife, Myra, was in her room getting dressed for the party. I got a bottle of champagne from the refrigerator and headed upstairs. Rosetta, the cook, was in the kitchen with Romero, her son. I tapped on her door. She opens it. I hand her a glass of champagne. We drink, we kiss, and we toast. We drink, we kiss, we toast again…By seven o’clock the bottle is finished, my wife is sloshed, and I’m completely toasted. Suddenly, a gentle knock on the door. The door opens and a strange young man looks down on us with a knife in his hands. Myra screams. I jump up and run for the gun in my drawer. I run back in with the pistol, ready to save my wife’s life. The strange young man says, “Yo quito se dablo enchilada por quesa en quinto minuto.” But I don’t speak Spanish, and I never saw Rosetta’s son, Romero, before, so I aimed my gun at him, Myra screams and pulls my arm. The gun goes off and shoots me in the ear lobe.

No 2 – Dead Heart by Nick Parsons

Ray: No! No! No! Don’t give me that bullshit. That spooky Aboriginal bullshit. I don’t want to hear it; I don’t want to know. Christ. Time was the man was dead and that was it. A man was just a man. Now they follow you round. If he’s dead he should be in the ground: in the cold fucking ground; he should be … growing into something else, not … crawling out and trailing you with his long rope hangin’ off him. That’s not … the way it’s done. I won’t stand for it. I’ve worked for people. I’ve tried to make … They gotta learn to be whitefellas! (Tapping his head) Up here. That’s what the world is. You know that Dave; You – you seen it. Tribal way is finished; it doesn’t have a chance, and Poppy is not gunna drag this on and on and on till every last young fella’s drunk himself to death or … strung himself up because he doesn’t know what he is any more.

No 3 – Fool for Love by Sam Shepard

Eddie: And we walked right through town. Past the donut shop; past the miniature golf course; past the Chevron station. And he opened the bottle up and offered it to me. Before he even took a drink, he offered it to me first. And I took it and drank it and handed it back to him. And we just kept passing it back and forth like that as we walked until we drank the whole thing dry. And we never said a word the whole time. Then, finally, we reached this little white house with a red awning, on the far side of town. I’ll never forget the red awning because it flapped in the night breeze and the porch light made it glow. It was a hot, desert breeze and the air smelt like new-cut alfalfa.

No 4 – Camelot by Lerner and Loewe

Arthur: When I was a lad of eighteen, our King died in London and left no one to succeed him; only a sword stuck through an anvil which stood on a stone. Written on it in letters of gold it said: “Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone and anvil is rightwise King of all England.” Many chaps tried to dislodge it, and none could. Finally a great tournament was proclaimed for New Year’s Day, so that all the mightiest knights in England would be assembled at one time to have a go at the sword.I went to London as squire to my cousin, Sir Kay. The morning of the tournament, Kay discovered he’d left his sword at home and gave me a shilling to ride back to fetch it.

No 5 – Eat Your Heart Out by Nick Hall

Charlie:  If there is one thing I can’t stand in the theatre, it’s walking out alone on stage at the beginning of the evening to open a show cold. (Grins.) But it’s better than waiting tables.  I’m Charlie, (Ironic)… your waiter for the evening.  I’d rather be onstage tonight.  Waiting tables is a toy job.  You probably don’t know what a toy job is.  I’ll explain.  (He measures the audience) But maybe you know already.  Being a waiter is sort of a standard job for an actor; it’s expected.  I mean, if you’re a dentist or an insurance salesman and someone says “where’re ya’ workin’ nowadays,” and you say, “I’m a waiter at this little French place on fifty-sixth street,” they think you’re a failure.  But if you’re an actor, they understand.  So, (Indicates the restaurant with a gesture) Ici, personne ne parle francais.  That’s the name of the place.  Yeah, well I didn’t get it the first time either.  It means no one here speaks French. 

 

Female Contemporary

 

 

No 1 The Star-Spangled Girl by Neil Simon

Sophie:  Mr. Cornell, Ah have tried to be neighborly, Ah have tried to be friendly, and Ah have tried to be cordial…Ah don’t know what it is that you’re tryin’ to be. That first night Ah was appreciative that you carried mah trunk up the stairs…The fact that it slipped and fell five flights and smashed to pieces was not your fault…Ah didn’t even mind that personal message you painted on the stairs. Ah thought it was crazy, but sorta sweet. However, things have now gone too far…Ah cannot accept gifts from a man Ah hardly know…Especially canned goods. And Ah read your little note. Ah can guess the gist of it even though Ah don’t speak Italian. This has got to stop, Mr. Cornell.

No 2 – Addams Family Values by Paul Rudnick

Wednesday Addams:  Wait, we cannot break bread with you. You have taken the land which is rightfully ours. Years from now my people will be forced to live in mobile homes on reservations. Your people will wear cardigans, and drink highballs. We will sell our bracelets by the road sides, and you will play golf. My people will have pain and degradation. Your people will have stick shifts. The gods of my tribe have spoken. They said do not trust the pilgrims. And especially do not trust Sarah Miller. For all these reasons I have decided to scalp you and burn your village to the ground.

No 3 – Three Sisters by Anton Chekhov

Natasha: It’s carnival time, the servants are getting careless, you have to keep an eye on them constantly, to make sure nothing’s wrong. I walked through the dining room at midnight last night, and there was a candle left burning. And I still haven’t found out who lit it. Olga and Irina still aren’t in. They haven’t come home. They’re kept busy the whole time, poor things. Olga and her staff meeting, Irina at her telegraph office… I said that to your sister this morning, ‘You must look after yourself, Irina darling’, I said. But she doesn’t listen. Quarter past eight, did you say? You know, I’m afraid our little Bobik isn’t at all well. Why is he so cold? He had a fever yesterday, and today he’s freezing… I’m really worried about him!

No 4 – Who’s Afraid of the Working Class? by Andrew Bovell

Rhonda: Carol says, “Problem with you, Rhonda, problem with you is that you’re just too fertile. You just got to look at a man and you’re up the duff.” And we laughed but she’s right, she’s fucking right. Woman from Welfare says, “it must be hard. Must be hard for you, Rhonda, with all those kids. Looking after them, it must be hard”. And I say “No. it’s not hard.” Though it is. I know it and she knows it. But I’m not going to give her the satisfaction. So I say, “No. Those kids, those kids are my blessings. Everyone of them a blessing. You understand. A blessing”. Though it is … hard. But it’s like Carol says I only got to look at a man. Anyway, I’m down the pub playing the bandits when Carol, she’s my neighbour, lives in the flat next door, Carol comes in and says, “Cops were over your place earlier”. And I said, “Oh yeah, what do they want this time?

No 5 – Listening by Edward Albee

She: He was over seventy, my grandfather, and I think they’s been happy — thought it was a generation wouldn’t let you know, you know? — and one fine day he simply disappeared, didn’t pack a bag, or act funny beforehand, simply said he was going into town to get some snuff, and off he went, and do you think he came back? He did not! Never came back… the man at the tobacco store where the sold snuff said no, he’d not come in, when they asked, and you can be sure they did; and one man said he’s seen him take a left at the library, and the policeman said no he’d seen him go off down Willow past the hardware store and Mrs. Remsen — the Lord rest her soul — said that wasn’t true at all, that he said good day to her on the corner of Pocket and Dunder and sauntered off in the direction of the bank — to which, of course, it turned out he had not been. And so my grandmother made a map — being that way, you know: a methodical family — and found the locus where they all has seen him, some others, too, and determined from that, from all the information they’d put together, that from that spot, that locus, he had gone off in several directions at the same time. he had, in effect, dispersed.